Saturday, November 22, 2008

I'm not binge eating

Well, since Wednesday, I have not binged. Tonight is sort of a test, since my husband is on duty, and I am alone. And, I am not binging. I binge eat every time he is on duty. Always. If there isn't junk food in the house, I will overeat healthy or semi-healthy food. But, no, I have even gotten in the habit of planing a binge, making sure the Pringles or junk food is on hand, knowing that I will likely want it later.

My counselor had me keep a food diary of what I was eating last week, and I did - four out of the seven days. It was pretty gross, and also pretty typical. But, now I am planning my meals and snacks. If you've dieted, well, you've probably done that. The difference is, I'm planning exactly when I will eat. And, I suppose, when I won't eat. I am good at following rules, so this seems to be helping.

I'm not dieting, and planning meals when I'm not dieting is kinda strange. Will I lose weight anyways? Who knows? I am guessing that I will, because if you cut out full boxes of Little Debbie snacks, bags of dove chocolate and multiple trips to McD's well something good will probably happen to you :)

I am going to read a chapter from Men are From Mars and Women are From Venus Together Forever. Is this my midlife crisis? I'm inching towards my 40's! Maybe- but, its time to get somethings in my life under control and to stop hating myself, I think.

My husband told me in an anxious moment (like months ago) that he wanted our home to be a restful haven. I think my reply was something like, "yah, so do I, and I spend more time here than you!" Well, I do want this home to be a restful and relaxing haven, and it will be, because I'm going to make it that way with God's help!

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